We study the effect of valence band spin-orbit interactions on the acoustic phonon assisted spin relaxation of holes confined in quantum dots. Heavy hole-light hole (hh-lh) mixing and all the spin-orbit terms arising from zinc-blende bulk inversion asymmetry (BIA) are considered on equal footing in a fully 3D Hamiltonian. We show that hh-lh mixing and BIA have comparable contributions to the hole spin relaxation in self-assembled QDs, but BIA becomes dominant in gated QDs. The dependence of the

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... hole spin relaxation on the QD geometry and spin splitting energy is drastically different from that of electrons, with a non-monotonic behavior which results from the interplay between SOI terms. Our results reconcile contradictory predictions of previous theoretical works and are consistent with experiments.